Adorkable

All Is (Well and Nice)

Fri, 25 May 2012 20:15:38 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …give a poet a follow.

I lost my childhood between red, paisley sheets …

at the point where futures we destroy and futures

we burn to keep meet for once and forever.

And in a moment, like Xavier’s helmet, I saw every

face of pain across my entire generation. All was

not lost, just stuck in low clouds hanging over us.

A man sells a broken record, still in the sleeve, at

a garage sale down my street. “Why would I pay

for what will never play?” …he looks at me to tell me

I’ve heard all the songs already. It’s just pictures on

cardboard, notes and track lengths, evaporating into

something meant to be displayed above a fireplace.

A girl I drunk dialed becomes a woman with a life …

The blue site tells me she no longer stays up rambling

to writers in the middle of the night.

All is well. All is nice.

Not Paper. Not Pens.

Tue, 22 May 2012 23:39:08 -0400

My insides are Photoshopped like a movie poster- a cityscape, a hero’s cape, a logo re-invented for 2008. The credits are tall, like my stomach a few inches off the floor. We curate a gallery opening to show off a network of call-and-return veins to everyone we love.

Swish around some mouthwash, feel it burn against gums. The dental hygienist called out numbers when she measured my Gingivitis, all 5’s and 6’s. “Why don’t you floss kid? Don’t you know it will save your life?” If I was measured out, 200 waxed yards at a time, there would be no diseases left to find.

A girl tells me that she can’t deal with things now that he left. I told her that there’s a him, a you, and a story to give this story to. I am not paper. I am not pens. I am two eyes to see …two ears to listen. I can make you feel better with words. I can make you feel better with my mouth. Either way will not make you better. Either way will just make you worse.

Something crumbles off the side of the JP Morgan building in Manhattan. It falls like a Gargoyle from the clutches of Saturday morning cartoons. It kills a man trying to buy an umbrella off a hairy street vendor. The newspapers report the story. 58. Married. What a shame. How unlucky.

The Dealer.

Wed, 16 May 2012 23:02:06 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini ….but only if you’re going to see Battleship.

Jesus rode in on the back of a drug mule,

from Sarasota to Webster Hall,

where he met a man on the sidewalk-

unloading pounds needing to be resold.

I played Starfox 64 until I got that call-

“head down to the playground and wait.”

I took my mother’s Nissan. The one with

the half-full tank. I saw him surrounded

by apostles just waiting to forsake him to

the DEA. The cellophane was store-bought,

but the bale was heavy just the same.

The sun set over my tax dollars at work.

Riches held the dusk, then blew away.

Hi, there! I really like what you write, to begin. :) I am an aspiring writer and I was just wondering through what channels you went in order to publish a book. I've been snooping around the interwebs for ideas but I'm too broke to hire an agent full-time to represent me for me. Any suggestions for me? Also, I love your poetry collection -- can't wait to buy your first book and the anticipated one! --LVB

Tue, 15 May 2012 12:08:23 -0400

hey! so, this thing started in 2008 when I graduated college. I had a book idea, but no audience, no actual knowledge of publishing, nothing …so I’d work during the day and type away at night. No blog, no articles, just MS Word. I wrote a short story and added to it every day. I didn’t outline or have a real plan …just ideas I wanted to get down.

The book was done, so I found an online editorial service that primarily edited term papers …I spoke to the owner and he agreed to help me. He made all the edits to my book, which I then went through and re-worked the story. At the same time, I started putting together the other parts - the intro, the awkwardknowledgements, the front and back covers. At the end, I had all the pieces, but had to put them together.

Through one of my best friends, I found a company in upstate New York that published reports, instructional booklets, etc. They put together my book, laid it out, and published 50 copies of it. I gave those 50 away to family and friends. Once all the small tweaks were made, it was done. I published 150, then another 250, then on and on.

It wasn’t free. I drove and dispatched limousines, shot corporate videos, did anything I could to save up the 7500 dollars to make my book. Lastly, I found all of you on Tumblr …with the poems and a few fortunate reblogs, over 20,000 of you are here and are a part of this.

An agent is nice, but it’s not a guarantee that your book will get sold or published or read by anyone. You also can’t hire them …they agree to represent you. Now, along with every industry, publishing is in distress …traditional means are all but gone. That being said, if no one cared, I wouldn’t be here.

You made this what it is. Two Wrongs Make a Vice and Fingerless Gloves are your stories. I wouldn’t be here without my friends, my family, people who took the time to work with me. I’ve met amazing people on this journey …and you will too. One day, we’ll look at this as the moment when writing and writers changed. When unique voices emerged from unlikely places ..when, all together, we dented the world.

I just went through your blog and read your poems. I wish it was a book. Your blog is very much appreciated:)

Tue, 15 May 2012 10:30:12 -0400

hi! So I’m going to be releasing a second poetry collection soon. This one will be put up for sale as an ebook and will also be placed in some cafes and bookstores. You can buy both of my books, as well as my first poetry collection Bruce Willis with Hair here:

www.twowrongsmakeavice.com

so i'm going to be in New York City all summer and i vainly hope i see you somewhere on the streets. just being you.

Tue, 15 May 2012 10:29:06 -0400

I can be found around midtown Manhattan …if you see me, say hi! I just got asked by a most excellent barista about my wrestling article on Thought Catalog: http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/professional-wrestling-has-lost-its-edge/

You’d better say hello! I’m around … beard, black glasses ..shouldn’t be hard to spot -___-

Ripley Got an Abortion

Mon, 14 May 2012 22:11:18 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …follow me like green tea, some antioxidants and we’ll all play pretend healthy!

Ripley was pregnant with an alien queen…

so we turned off that DVD.

After all, aren’t all abortions done for free?

My first love was big and plastic and on

the cover of November’s Maxim.

Audi Quattro and Schick Quattro and

intros and outros that no one buys on

iTunes. These things kill me.

Hey you, that’s right you …the guy in

the cafe with the portable turntable and

the spotted, wet suede shoes…

What are you listening to?Pet Sounds?

That’s cool …*CRACK* that was my knee

begging to be excused.

Open-Toed Fathers

Wed, 09 May 2012 22:17:27 -0400

I wrote this article about heroes:

http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/why-we-still-need-superheroes/

_______________________________

My earliest memory is the smell

of waffles at Walt Disney World.

My father took us to the resort

after caking his knees with dirt…

after a 1994 of plumbing work.

The color of the wave pools and

the newspaper under the door…

We would make 6AM coffee runs

when we couldn’t sleep anymore.

The greatest men are towels over

the sand at the New Jersey Shore.

Coke-bottle glasses in the middle

of the ocean, just to see the foam…

to hold his daughter’s hand again.

And the lights of the boardwalk

turn into a puzzle when it rains.

Lightning draws above a lifeguard

stand. We feel protected again.

Sexting.

Tue, 08 May 2012 22:39:24 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …follow me to the land of milk and Baileys.

I gave an RKO to my cellular phone

after “I wnt yer body” text messages.

The regrets we feel are yellow

Life Savers …skipped and lost.

Stuck to garbage bags.

Stuck in the trunk of

my 1991 Ford Taurus.

She wants to have sex to The Fugees.

Rumored reunions get me off.

I watch The Food Network with

a hand down my pants. I’m trying

to tattoo my body to prove that

the middle class can rise again.

Okay so for my final English project, I have to do a scrapbook with various quotes from books I've read and whatnot. Some of the quotes have been chosen but I got free range with the last few pages. I thought I'd let you know that I will be quoting YOU. Your words have spoken to me from the moment I first read your works. So, thanks for impacting my life. :)

Mon, 07 May 2012 11:46:53 -0400

thanks so much! this is why I started doing any of this. I was never trained as a writer …had no English or creative writing classes in college. I never had a mentor who taught me how to create things that mean something to someone. I never knew what a poem looked like, or sounded like …I only knew TS Eliot and Shakespeare and the things my high school English teacher taught. I didn’t even know what Tumblr was until I Googled “easy blogs” almost three years ago.

This is a testament to how we work together …to how, if a group of people believe that a poem is more than words that fit in rhythm and rhyme, those poems belong to no poet, but to an entire generation of people. I built this blog behind a desk at a job I hated. I thought that my future was fucked, so I had to at least keep a record of the ideas that were important …even if I would be broke and living in my old bedroom. A lot has happened since …but the sentiment is still the same. Thanks for being so good to me :)

this is a poem about The Sex Pistols It’d be the best if...

Sun, 06 May 2012 10:32:17 -0400

[Flash 10 is required to watch video.]

this is a poem about The Sex Pistols

It’d be the best if you bought my new book:

www.amazon.com/Fingerless-Gloves-ebook/dp/B007T8E0QG

It’d be the best if you laughed at my twitter jokes:

www.twitter.com/nickorsini

Lyndon Baines Johnson

Fri, 04 May 2012 21:12:08 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …follow me. I can’t lead anyone.

A celebrity is accused of a rape that’s statutory…

just a man acting on a sickness. We let him off

the hook because Twitter is pretentious. Our

opinions can’t be as valuable as Mario Lopez’s

ability to listen. The news glosses over the story

in a script designed to be horror-movie scary.

It’s an election year. Someone alert Wes Craven.

My favorite band just went acoustic because all

the members left to go to college. Oh well…

ch-ch-ch changes. I boot up my old tower and,

after an hour, I can finally launch Encarta. I look

up Lyndon B. Johnson because I like the pictures.

LBJ pinned a medal on my father during Vietnam.

All those out-loud birthdays couldn’t be wrong.

Orange Hair Dye

Wed, 02 May 2012 21:12:42 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …here we go.

My beard trimmer shaped me into an underdog

because I don’t look like Andre 3000. I still make

my beats to bounce off rusty fire escapes on these

expensive streets. A friend in Chicago asks what

hipster means …I tell him it’s when Johnny Rotten

is just a t-shirt and some orange hair dye combed

in. I walked down to Wall Street to spit on the police

only to have black glasses ask if she could write a blog

post about me. I spit into my empty coffee cup instead.

The mall smells like Wetzel’s Pretzels and Zumiez is

playing The Bends. So I buy up some jeans that come

with a warning:

every pair is not like the others.

when in doubt, wash these again.

Stephen Jenkins, Rob Thomas and the Wormhole Bursting from my Chest

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 22:02:48 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini ..I know you don’t follow too many poets. Cmon.

Francis’ Bar Mitzvah ends with a mix CD

…a Spirograph of Third Eye Blind and Matchbox

20. The girls have legs and hips. The boys have

chips and dip. The parking lot is cold with

up-too-late parents giving out rides home.

Erick’s mom’s Volvo smells like an urn full of

wet towels …and we pile in, leaving the safety

features fallible. Erick’s mom has a hard

life, spent unpacking lunch meat and throwing

it on ice. We listen to Saves the Day on a

computer that’s cow-box nice. We are all Rio

MP3 players and flashlight, dirt path hikes.

Francis never knew who to invite …so he picked

the boys with skinned knees and the girls with

highlights. We don’t listen to Rob or Stephen …

We just cough on cigarettes at night.

Poem aboutTronand growing up. You can buymy new book,Fingerless...

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 07:36:06 -0400

[Flash 10 is required to watch video.]

Poem aboutTronand growing up.

You can buymy new book,Fingerless Gloves, right here:

http://www.amazon.com/Fingerless-Gloves-ebook/dp/B007T8E0QG/

Follow me on twitter too!: www.twitter.com/nickorsini

Neil Young Sideburn Hairs

Fri, 27 Apr 2012 21:29:42 -0400

Mr. A-Z all about the wordplay

wrecked my Monday.

My friends hold voles in their

talons to get laid.

Hello. Is it me you’re looking for?

Nope. Sorry. Wrong door.

My mom bought me a globe for my

birthday decades before…

I peeled the paper so that there was

just a cardboard earth.

No cities or states or water or beach…

Borders to be breached.

Neil Young gave me his sideburn hair.

I kept it in a sandwich bag.

..Just waiting for the day those strands

would string my ax and help

me become whole again.

That day never came.

ThoughtCatalog.com Article!

Thu, 26 Apr 2012 20:06:15 -0400

So, I’m not sure how many of you have heard of Thought Catalog, but they were kind enough to allow me to come on board as a contributor. Check out my writing and my bio! Here’s my first article about the golden age of professional wrestling:

http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/professional-wrestling-has-lost-its-edge/

This is a huge step for me …thanks to the editors at the site for making this article great. If you’ve ever watched wrestling, enjoy!

so,question! have you ever thought about writing/making a movie,or even a short film of sorts? i feel like you could make a very pretty movie plot line. whilst reading your work,sometimes i picture in my head how it could so easily become a short film or something,so i was just pondering that&thought i'd ask:]

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 11:46:52 -0400

I wrote a few short screenplays in college. One was about Mark Summers regressing into drug use and freaking out on the set of What Would You Do. The other was actually a pretty gory horror/comedy one I wrote with my best friend called The Bloody Blowout …about a kid who gets tired of being bullied by guidos, so he kills them and scalps their blowouts to make a giant blowout head-dress. Very odd stuff. Both of those were from about 2010, and they were so weird that I kind of stopped writing screenplays lol.

That being said, if any of you like one of these poems, and you’d like to create a visual piece to go along with them, I’d be happy to collaborate with you! I love working with new people so if you’re a filmmaker looking for some material, and you like a story in one of these poems, send me a message on here and let’s make something out of it.

btw …anyone interested in buying the Bloody Blowout script/concept from me, it’s for sale lol.

Diner Douche

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 21:02:29 -0400

www.twitter.com/nickorsini …follow time! It’s like hammer time, but better.

The Bouncing Souls played my birthday party

and Sheena passed out in my lap.

And afterwards we went to the diner, but the

douchebags had the diner packed…

And there was the punk rock of 1994, reminding

us to break down diner doors.

We just kept on with the Sega wrestling and the

Coca-Cola fizzy waterboard.

Someone read Time Out: New York over a horn,

at a rally, to the protestors.

And a city offered up its best braised beef only to

feed a Coleman-tent fortress.

The Bouncing Souls broke up this morning…it

never made the nightly news.

We burned a city block, melted the sidewalks, to take

back the diner from the douche.

The Cabin in the Kindle Store

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 16:21:33 -0400

So, first off, thanks to everyone who wrote me last week requesting a copy of my new book, Fingerless Gloves. The book is live in the Kindle store now! It’s only $6

http://www.amazon.com/Fingerless-Gloves-ebook/dp/B007T8E0QG

I encourage everyone who got a free PDF, or who buys the book above, to review it on Amazon. The more reviews I get, the better it looks on the site. So, after you’re done, even if you just star it and write a little something, it would mean a lot.

Also- I was the featured guest on the BookGuys podcast. I’m the first 20-30 minutes of the show. It’s a great interview about my books, poems, etc. Listen below in your browser:

http://bookguys.ca/episode-039-two-wrongs-make-a-vice/

or in iTunes

http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/book-guys-show/id447964069